Does anyone know where I can find a copy of the rules of thought, feeling, and behavior in these circumstances? It seems like there should be a rule book somewhere that lays out everything exactly the way one should respond to a loss like this. I'd surely like to know if I'm doing it right. Am I whining enough or too much? Am I unseemly in my occasional moments of lightheartedness? At what date am I supposed to turn off the emotion and jump back on the treadmill of normalcy? Is there a specific number of days or decades that must pass before I can do something I enjoy without feeling I've betrayed my dearest love? And when, oh when, am I ever really going to believe this has happened? Next time you're in a bookstore, as if there's a rule book
Jim Beaver, Life's That Way: A Memoir
“Don't say mourning. It's too psychoanalytic. I'm not mourning. I'm suffering.”
Roland Barthes, Mourning Diary
“It's easier to miss her at a cemetery, where she's never been anything but dead, than to miss her at all the places where she was alive.”
John Scalzi, Old Man's War
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